


How to Forget

by vargulfr



Category: Arrowverse - Fandom, Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, F/F, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:36:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22705579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vargulfr/pseuds/vargulfr
Summary: Lena has moved on to someone new, Kara has moved somewhere new. Neither really knows how to deal with the fact they never really spoke.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Lena Luthor/Andrea Rojas
Comments: 10
Kudos: 104





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So this based on the song 'How to Forget' by Jason Isbell. It's a country song, which isn't usually my vibe, but this song hits for some reason. I was also originally gonna have the lyrics in the text but couldn't figure it out and I am very tired. Anyways! I hope you like sorry for the long note!

Lena’s POV  


“I thought we had external protocols for when Supergirl decided she wanted to show up outside my office window,” Lena said as she looked at the hovering caped figure in the sky. Still not close enough to read a facial expression, but close enough where she knew Kara could hear her. Slowly, arms wrapped around her waist and Lena leaned back into the warm touch. There was only a slight bit of guilt creeping into Lena’s mind.  


“She’ll go away soon, just give her time to adjust to this,” Andrea said. She pulled back from Lena, picking up a magazine off her desk. Lena watches until sirens are heard somewhere in the city, and Kara takes off with slight hesitation.  


“There’s another Kara Danvers article posted from Gotham, she seems to be doing really well over there.”  


“Have you read it? What’s it about?” Lena finally turns around to face Andrea after the guilt seeped back out.  


“Just how the amazing and transformative work of THE Lena Luthor in National City is helping Lex Luthor start to help out the tired streets of Gotham. Praising the name of the Luthors and all the good they’ve done for the country. You two were good friends. She helped put your name in a good light. Why do you think she just moved away from everything?”  


Lena winced at all the memories that flew into her head at the mention of them being good friends. She didn’t want to think about things that should have never been.  


“Maybe she felt she had done enough for National City, Supergirl is still here anyway. We have enough heroes.”  
Andrea laughed and went back over to give Lena a hug, which Lena accepted a little awkwardly still. Physical contact was something she had lost when Kara left, or when she left Kara rather. Pulling back, Andrea gave her a kiss on the cheek,  


“I have some meetings to go to, technology to create, you know how it is. I’ll see you later though babe. How do potstickers and pizza at mine for dinner tonight?” Another wince came from Lena, internal this time.  


“I have a lot of work to do, not sure I’ll make it there for dinner tonight,” Lena spoke as calmly as she could, but it felt like her gut was being twisted.  


“Well, then I will see you tonight for dessert,” Andrea added with a wink as she turned and left Lena’s office.  
Lena for probably the first time in her life had no urge to get any work done. She called in her assistant and canceled all her meetings for the rest of the day. She got her things and called for a cab. By the time she got down there, the car was waiting, and she sat in the back listening to silence on her way home. All she could think of were the times when Supergi- no Kara, had openly distrusted her and how much it hurt to be treated that way. Sure, Andrea had lied to Lena for years. But her reason was valid. Kara’s excuse for being scared and wanting to protect Lena made no sense. Before Lena even knew Kara existed, she had already survived multiple assassination attempts, knowing Kara was Supergirl could have made her safer if anything.  


Finally arriving home, Lena kicked off her shoes by the doorway and made her way to her kitchen to pour herself a drink. Walking out onto the balcony, she saw the same caped figure hovering in the sky above her. She took a long sip, staring. Finally, she whispered quietly,  
“Come here, Kara.”

Kara’s POV  
Just as I’m landing on the balcony, Lena is looking at me with the most anger in her eyes I’ve ever seen.  


“Why’d you leave Kara? Your whole family, friends? ..Me? Why?”  


“It was… too much for me Lena. The guilt, your anger towards me. All of it was too much and being here all the time, this city. It just made it hurt more.” Maybe it was my hopeful thinking, but the anger softened a little bit, not a lot, but enough.  


“So what Kara you just left because you couldn’t stand the fact that someone was mad at you.” She asked before taking another long sip of her drink.  


“I left because it was breaking my heart. Lena, everything I did was to try and protect you but it just hurt me in the end and I was tired of the pain that it caused me.” I was having trouble maintaining eye contact, especially with Lena’s eyebrows raised, like she was accusing me of something.  


“It broke your heart.” She spoke with such venom in her voice that I took a step back, I had to look away.  


“Yes, it was for you. everything. I tried my best for you and I made the biggest mistake of my life because I couldn’t figure it out.”  


“Figure what out, Kara?”  


“You.”  


“What?”  


“My feelings for you. The way that I thought you were my best friend but I wanted more. I always wanted more than that but I just- I had never felt like that before. With anyone. It scared me. I thought if I spilled one secret they’d all come rushing out and they would all ruin our friendship so I just didn’t say any of it. Because I least I have you. Had.” Lena had the slightest bit of tears in her eyes, she put her empty glass down.  


“What about Mon-El? Or Willi-”  


“It isn’t the same. I have never felt the same about anyone else than the way you make me feel Lena.”  
She wasn’t looking at me at this point, but I listened to her heart, strong, beating fast. When it finally slowed to a normal pace, Lena picked up her drink and moved back inside, leaving the balcony door open, I followed her inside. She poured herself another drink, taking a large gulp, and finally setting the glass down in the sink.  


“And what about Kate?” Lena asked abruptly. “You two always seemed...close.”  


“She helps me through things, emotionally. I help her through things, we have a lot in common I think, both outcasts in some way. Sometimes we spar together. We set up a kryptonite room in her...cave. But we’re just friends Lena.”  


“You trust her enough? To not hurt you?”  


“I’ve only been hurting myself recently Lena. I’m not sure about anyone else.”  


“And what, did you think telling me all of this wouldn’t break my heart? That was finally starting to mend after you broke it how many months ago?”  


“I didn’t think it would matter Lena, not after you find out I was lying to you. Not after everything I’ve done.” My eyes started to sting from the tears threatening to fall. “I almost sacrificed myself, Lena, to save this planet, but to also save you. And I would do it again. I’d do anything to fix this, if I could turn back time and do everything over and just be honest I would Lena. But I can’t, so I’m doing it now.” Tears are falling from my eyes now, slowly onto the white floor of Lena’s kitchen.  


“And anyway, you’re with Andrea now. And she’s good for you. I hope it works out. I want you to be happy, that’s the most important thing. But I still love you Lena and there will never be a day I am alive that I don’t. So if you ever change-”  


“I can’t leave her Kara, just because I’m in love with you. It wouldn’t be fair to her.”  


“So, what Lena, you want me to move on? You’re just gonna move on? From me?”  


“No, I’m moving on without you Kara.”


	2. it left a bruise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara is injured and requires Lena's help. Will they get to talk through their issues? (i suck at summaries)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title of this chapter from a song called Blind Love by Lola Young. I highly suggest listening to it to get the vibes I was kind of going for in this chapter. I might add a third part, what do y’all think?

Lena’s POV

“Breaking news incoming from Gotham: Supergirl and Batwoman lose the fight to the mysterious gang that has been terrorizing the streets of Gotham City. Sources report large amounts of alien tech and weapons, along with Kryptonite were used. There has been no update on Supergirl’s current health condition, all we know for certain is that the situation looks bleak.” 

“No, no no no.” Lena shut off the TV and began to pace in front of the couch. “Okay deep breaths she’s gonna be okay. It’s all fine, she’s gonna be-” My phone starts ringing on the coffee table, I flip it over to see and call coming in from Alex Danvers, 

“Alex I-” 

“We need you, Lena. Whatever happened between you or whatever is happening, just push it aside okay? We’re on your way to your apartment so we can get to Gotham.” 

“I’ll be down there waiting.” Hurrying, I grabbed the bag I keep in my closet for emergencies and tried to push all the dark thoughts out of my head about what could possibly be happening all the way in Gotham. I had just left the building when I see multiple black SUVs barreling down the street. One stops at the curb while the other’s keep going on. Before I can get in Alex hops out the car and pulls me into a hug. Pushing her away from me, my thoughts still not clear, 

“Kara-she we have to go.” 

“J’onn is flying us so it’ll be faster, the rest of the agents are going to provide backup to fight in Gotham.” She starts dragging me to the car as J’onn gets out to lift the car and start flying. Although we were moving quickly the negative feeling started to creep back in, I dug my nails into my palm to try and force myself back to reality. 

“Hey,” Alex says while grabbing my hands. “We’re going to get there in time and we will help and she will be okay. Do you understand?” 

“But what if-” 

“No. She will be okay.” Just as she said that J’onn let us down in a field. 

“It’s this way, come on.” He says as he leads us to a door hidden in the ground. We go through a few more doors and tunnels until we reach what looks like a very rundown medic bay. I’m looking through the room and see Kate Kane looking significantly injured laying on a cot, but before I can ask any questions, the doors bang open as DEO agents roll Kara in on a stretcher. The Kara that had perfect skin to go with the prettiest smile and the warmest hands. Kara who now has multiple open wounds with blood and the sickening green clouding up her veins. 

“Lena snap out of it it’s time to move,” Alex shouted as we rushed to start helping her, moving to first clear up the wounds as J’onn searched the lair for something to help get the Kryptonite out of her system faster. We made our first moves when I heard a noise come from Kara’s mouth. Before any proper words came out of her mouth I started to bark orders, 

“She’s awake we need to give her a sedative! Where is J’onn with a cure? Get this suit off her needs to be able to breathe properly.” Alex and the other medics started hustling to get everything done. I took another glance at Kara once we had administered the sedative to see her eyes start to flutter close. We continued working on the external wounds as J’onn came in with a few vials of liquid and a yellow sun lamp. 

“Here, the yellow sun lamp will help with recovery and this should clear out her veins and pump the Kryptonite back into the air.” I grab the vials as Alex sets up the lamp. Slowly we start to see the green streaks leave Kara’s body. Everyone seems to let out a sigh of relief collectively until a loud boom is heard from above ground. 

“The fight must still be happening, I need to go up to help my agents but these medics can stay here in case anything goes wrong, okay Lena?” I try to nod my head but doubt comes in again, “Hey, she’s gonna be okay.” Alex gives me a quick hug before taking off with J’onn to deal with the threat. I sit in a chair next to the bed Kara is on, watching the monitor beep and flash. 

“She misses you, you know that right?” I jump at the sound of Kate’s voice from the corner. I rush over to her to look at her wounds but she holds up a hand to stop me. “My body can recover from what’s happened to it, hers wouldn’t have if you weren’t here. You could’ve easily been stubborn and not shown up to help her.” 

“I’m always going to help her. She was my best friend for so long and saved me as Kara and Supergirl and I just know that I would do anything to bring her back. Absolutely nothing has been the same without her in National City and I just don’t know what to do without her. I thought I could just move on but she’s so important I just miss her.” Right as I finished the beeping on Kara’s monitor picked up and her body started jolting up and down, 

“She’s seizing! We need to up the sedative,” I yelled as I scrambled to get the needle in properly, a different medic added an IV to keep her vitals healthy and the beeping slowed as Kara’s body relaxed again and her breathing seemed less labored. There was almost no green in her veins and you could tell the sun lamps were making her stronger. I sat there staring at her while Kate spoke up again, 

“You know I am almost 100% positive that if you asked her to, she would move back to National City with you.” 

“You think so?” 

“Absolutely. Now if you don’t mind I’m going to take a hot shower and get some rest. Maybe you should too.” 

“Soon.” As Kate left the room I watched Kara’s now peaceful figure. “Kara I’m sorry I put you through this, and while I know you did something similar, I forgive you. I’m glad you took whatever time you needed to away but I miss you so much. So when you wake up you’re going to come with me and your sister back home. We’re going to work on our friendship with each other and whatever you want me to be in your life I’ll do it. I need you Kara and I can never be sorry enough for leaving you alone and for forcing you to watch me try and move on. There is no moving forward if I’m not with you and I am so sorry I thought I could. I’m sorry that I even-” 

“Lena you’re rambling.” 

“Kara! Kara oh my god you’re awake. Are you in pain? Do you need anything? Water or something? I can get it for you.” 

“Lena, shh. It’s okay, I’m okay.” Kara said as she reached for my hand, she started to rub her thumb across my hand. 

“Are you sure you're alright? How are you feeling?” Kara’s face slowly moved into a dopey grin. “Why are you smiling?” 

“You’re cute when you worry, but I’m okay. It’s all gonna be okay.” 

“Kara I’m sorry for what happened and for how I treated you. I’m sorry for-” 

“Lena it’s alright. You don’t have to apologize, I know.” She said giving my hand a squeeze, still smiling. “I’ll move back to National City, all you had to do was ask.” 

“I was scared you hated me.” 

“There will never be a universe where I can hate you, Lena Luthor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also thank you SO much to everyone that commented! I kept reading them to help inspire me to finish the chapter. also, my Tumblr is @tiny-peacemaker but I don't really use it that often, but my personal is @greltub and that's just where I reblog random stuff so stop by if you want a friend! thank you so much for reading!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this! I hope you liked it I haven't really done angst or anything sad before so, comments are cool and so are you! P.S sorry about grammar and spelling also aha


End file.
